My father has been recently diagnosed with multiple myeloma. He has a large mass on his sternum that they are going to begin treating with radiation. His bone scan (xrays) show at least 4 other lesions. He will be having a bone marrow biopsy done which I understand will tell us the stage he is in. At the last dr. appointment, the results of his urine analysis wasn't back yet.
My mother and father are kind of in the dark about this. They only know what the doctor has told them, which isn't much since all of the tests aren't back yet. My sister and I have been doing research online. I plan to get together with my sister this week to talk about what mom & dad may or may not know, and what we need to tell them and when. If we wait until we know the results of the bone marrow biopsy, they might be completely unprepared for what the doctor tells them. At our last appointment, there were so many questions I wanted to ask the doctor, but I didn't want to ask them in front of my parents.
It's hard for me to feel optimistic about this. Everything I've read about some of the more aggressive treatments aren't an option for someone over 65. I'm so confused and don't know how to put on a brave face and help them. Do I wait until we know the stage to share what we have learned? Do I tell them now? What kind of treatment is done for someone my father's age?
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Re: Over 65
Hi Dawn,
I'm so sorry to hear about your dad. I'm sure all of this is overwhelming.
There are a lot of treatment options out there, and it can be confusing. I think the first thing you need to determine is whether or not your dad is a candidate for a stem cell transplant. His physical age is more inportant than his chronological age. If he is in good health, his doctor may want to consider this. It is important to make this decision early so that he isn't exposed to certain drugs.
My second suggestion is to keep a notebook where you and your parents can write down your questions before you see the doctor. This can help make sure everyone's questions get heard.
I wish you and your family all the best.
Lyn
I'm so sorry to hear about your dad. I'm sure all of this is overwhelming.
There are a lot of treatment options out there, and it can be confusing. I think the first thing you need to determine is whether or not your dad is a candidate for a stem cell transplant. His physical age is more inportant than his chronological age. If he is in good health, his doctor may want to consider this. It is important to make this decision early so that he isn't exposed to certain drugs.
My second suggestion is to keep a notebook where you and your parents can write down your questions before you see the doctor. This can help make sure everyone's questions get heard.
I wish you and your family all the best.
Lyn
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Christa's Mom - Name: Christa's Mom
- Who do you know with myeloma?: Husband
- When were you/they diagnosed?: September, 2010
- Age at diagnosis: 53
Re: Over 65
Hi Dawn,
If your father is healthy, besides the multiple myeloma, he should be eligible for any treatment.
If it's possible to get a second opinion about treatment from a multiple myeloma specialist, I would recommend it.
Your father is very lucky that you and your sister are taking such an active part in his care.
Know that there is a lot of hope in treating multiple myeloma. Try to read only the newest information online. Surely nothing before 2008.
The only thing I can think of not to ask the doctor in front of your Dad is his prognosis.
The very best to all of you.
Lin
If your father is healthy, besides the multiple myeloma, he should be eligible for any treatment.
If it's possible to get a second opinion about treatment from a multiple myeloma specialist, I would recommend it.
Your father is very lucky that you and your sister are taking such an active part in his care.
Know that there is a lot of hope in treating multiple myeloma. Try to read only the newest information online. Surely nothing before 2008.
The only thing I can think of not to ask the doctor in front of your Dad is his prognosis.
The very best to all of you.
Lin
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Lin
Re: Over 65
Dawn,
As far as age is concerned, my mother was diagosed last August with Stage II multiple myeloma. She underweat 4 rounds of RVD therapy last October through December and had a successful Stem Cell Transplant on February 8th of this year. This September she will celebrate her 79th birthday. Of course there were ups and downs, but with any type of cancer treatment unfortunately it comes with the territory.
Just thought you might need a bit of encouragement.
take care,
Tom
As far as age is concerned, my mother was diagosed last August with Stage II multiple myeloma. She underweat 4 rounds of RVD therapy last October through December and had a successful Stem Cell Transplant on February 8th of this year. This September she will celebrate her 79th birthday. Of course there were ups and downs, but with any type of cancer treatment unfortunately it comes with the territory.
Just thought you might need a bit of encouragement.
take care,
Tom
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Tom S - Name: Tom S
- Who do you know with myeloma?: mother
- When were you/they diagnosed?: August 2010
- Age at diagnosis: 77
Re: Over 65
Thank you for your responses
My father has his bone marrow biopsy today. My sister and I decided not to have a serious conversation with my parents until we get the results of the biopsy. He started radiation yesterday on the mass on his sternum. For now, he is taking short term disability from work. He's a heavy equipment operator. I talked to him on Sunday about entertaining the idea of retirement. He has a lot of emotional and physical stress at his job. I worry about him climbing up those big muddy tracks to get into the cab, and then climbing down. He can do a lot of volunteer work with people in his church to keep busy.
He has diabetes, high blood pressure, and he had a heart attack five years ago. I went down on Sunday and helped my parents organize a calendar to keep track of his appointments. I also told him I want him to keep track of his blood sugar numbers on the calendar so we can keep an eye on that.
My father has his bone marrow biopsy today. My sister and I decided not to have a serious conversation with my parents until we get the results of the biopsy. He started radiation yesterday on the mass on his sternum. For now, he is taking short term disability from work. He's a heavy equipment operator. I talked to him on Sunday about entertaining the idea of retirement. He has a lot of emotional and physical stress at his job. I worry about him climbing up those big muddy tracks to get into the cab, and then climbing down. He can do a lot of volunteer work with people in his church to keep busy.
He has diabetes, high blood pressure, and he had a heart attack five years ago. I went down on Sunday and helped my parents organize a calendar to keep track of his appointments. I also told him I want him to keep track of his blood sugar numbers on the calendar so we can keep an eye on that.
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dawn - Name: Dawn
- Who do you know with myeloma?: Father
- When were you/they diagnosed?: May 2011
- Age at diagnosis: 69
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