I realize this is a tricky subject with lots of variables, so I will just explain my situation and ask for any advice.
I have worked very hard all my life under high stress to provide a good lifestyle for my family. I willingly sacrificed a lot of my own interests for my family because I knew that when I retired I would be able to indulge myself and live stress free while traveling the world for many years. Obviously, multiple myeloma changed all this - I will start a stem cell transplant in the next couple months.
My dilemma really boils down to trying to maximize my retirement with the time I have left. I don't have enough savings to retire now, and I have 2 kids starting college. Before getting diagnosed, I would have retired in 8 years. I used to love my occupation, but now the only redeeming factor is the financial reward (this is mainly due to high stress and physical limitations).
At this point I would be thrilled to have 4-5 years post retirement to travel, etc. My biggest fear is that I will go straight from a high stress work life to the end stage multiple myeloma without ever being able to experience the part of my life that I have planned for since I was 18 years old. Since everything hinges on how much time I have (an unknown), what is the best way to avoid my biggest fear?
Thanks in advance.
Forums
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scoob - Name: dave
- Who do you know with myeloma?: me
- When were you/they diagnosed?: July 2015
- Age at diagnosis: 53
Re: Lifestyle and financial planning?
My husband was just recently diagnosed with myeloma, and we do not know what stage etc. yet due to waiting on appointment with the hematologist /oncologist on January 7th. He was diagnosed by our primary MD with SPEP blood test and Bence Jones urine test added with symptoms. We are also at that stage as you. I work part time as a Med Tech and he has been fortunate enough to have a well paying job that has allowed us to live well (not outrageous but well). We have been planning for retirement as with you and now we are just trying to process...we own a small farm and have a few head of cattle that my husband enjoys to fool with and we had hoped to retire to that lifestyle and be able to live without much if any financial worry....as if the disease itself is not enough to deal with ....if you find any answers please share.
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dogmom - Who do you know with myeloma?: husband
- When were you/they diagnosed?: December 2015
- Age at diagnosis: 58
Re: Lifestyle and financial planning?
Same boat here. I've been living with this disease for 3 years and was looking to retire at 62, another 5 years. I could retire early, but like you I've worked a stressful job to support the family and the family still needs my support. My out-of-pocket expenses have been very high with my chemo maintenance. Plus I had to take a leave of absence to recover from my transplant.
The bottom line is my expenses are up, my wife will likely spend a longer period of retirement without a combined social security income. So, I keep working to make sure my wife is taken care of regardless of my own personnel goals.
Plus, my dream of retirement may not be as special as I once thought. I find great enjoyment in my day to day living. Jerry
The bottom line is my expenses are up, my wife will likely spend a longer period of retirement without a combined social security income. So, I keep working to make sure my wife is taken care of regardless of my own personnel goals.
Plus, my dream of retirement may not be as special as I once thought. I find great enjoyment in my day to day living. Jerry
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JBarnes - Name: Jerry Barnes
- Who do you know with myeloma?: Self
- When were you/they diagnosed?: Aug 17, 2012
- Age at diagnosis: 54
Re: Lifestyle and financial planning?
My husband was diagnosed 4.5 years ago at 54. Your retirement plans were pretty similar to ours. At the time, one kid was a freshman in college, the other was a junior in high school. Fortunately, his job is fairly flexible when it comes to vacation time off. We have traveled as much as possible during these last 4.5 years. Some of those trips were preceded by a "topping off" with a blood transfusion just before we left (anemia)! He has actually lived longer than we originally thought he would (17p deletion), but new treatments keep coming out that he responds to, so now we don't really think about having x many years left.
Do as many of the things that you want to do as you possibly can, while balancing it with still being fiscally responsible. You may, or may not, have that planned retirement. We hope that you will.
Do as many of the things that you want to do as you possibly can, while balancing it with still being fiscally responsible. You may, or may not, have that planned retirement. We hope that you will.
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rumnting - Who do you know with myeloma?: husband
- When were you/they diagnosed?: 4/9/11
- Age at diagnosis: 54
Re: Lifestyle and financial planning?
Thanks for the replies. Its seems we are all in similar predicaments.
Jerry - How long did it take you to recover from the stem cell transplant? I am self employed and my income drops to zero when I cannot work.
Rumnting- Where are some of the trips you have taken since diagnosis? Glad to hear you are exceeding expectations.
It's strange, I've spent the last 15 years trying to figure out how I am going to deal with the possible death of my youngest son during my lifetime (he was diagnosed with cystic fibrosis at birth), and now it looks like that will be a needless worry for me. He is doing well and better than expected. I guess it truly is a matter of seeking enjoyment one day at a time.
Jerry - How long did it take you to recover from the stem cell transplant? I am self employed and my income drops to zero when I cannot work.
Rumnting- Where are some of the trips you have taken since diagnosis? Glad to hear you are exceeding expectations.
It's strange, I've spent the last 15 years trying to figure out how I am going to deal with the possible death of my youngest son during my lifetime (he was diagnosed with cystic fibrosis at birth), and now it looks like that will be a needless worry for me. He is doing well and better than expected. I guess it truly is a matter of seeking enjoyment one day at a time.
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scoob - Name: dave
- Who do you know with myeloma?: me
- When were you/they diagnosed?: July 2015
- Age at diagnosis: 53
Re: Lifestyle and financial planning?
Scoob: 2 years ago: Italy. Last year: Spain. We spent last March in Scottsdale, AZ. He was on a 2 x a week treatment then, so his doctor arranged for him to have it at the Mayo Clinic in Scottsdale. We are doing it again in 2016. We have also traveled to Jamaica, and several places around the US. He has also done a few several day motorcycle trips. Mind you, this was all done while undergoing active treatment.
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rumnting - Who do you know with myeloma?: husband
- When were you/they diagnosed?: 4/9/11
- Age at diagnosis: 54
Re: Lifestyle and financial planning?
rumnting,
This is so very encouraging for those of us who have had a new diagnosis (husband). My husband and I love to go to The Smokey Mountains once a year and it is just a 5 hour drive from our home, so if you can do all that, surely we can do this.
This is so very encouraging for those of us who have had a new diagnosis (husband). My husband and I love to go to The Smokey Mountains once a year and it is just a 5 hour drive from our home, so if you can do all that, surely we can do this.
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dogmom - Who do you know with myeloma?: husband
- When were you/they diagnosed?: December 2015
- Age at diagnosis: 58
Re: Lifestyle and financial planning?
I was diagnosed and started treatment over 6 years ago. I continue to work, hope to until my wife is eligible for Medicare, when I turn 67. I am 63 now.
I am an avid cyclist and have traveled with my biking buddies to Belgium (2013) for 2 weeks and this past spring spent 3 weeks in Italy. Since my diagnosis I have also been to Dubai a couple of times that were work-related trips as well as short trips to Washington DC, LA and Indianapolis. (I live in the Dallas area.) I also did one-day trips to some of my bike races including camping out in the Palo Dura Canyon in North west Texas. (The picture of me is in a tent at that race called "24 hours in the Canyon".) We did a 2 man 12 hour team bike race from midnight Saturday until noon Sunday. I then drove 6 hours back to Dallas and went to work the next day!
I am an avid cyclist and have traveled with my biking buddies to Belgium (2013) for 2 weeks and this past spring spent 3 weeks in Italy. Since my diagnosis I have also been to Dubai a couple of times that were work-related trips as well as short trips to Washington DC, LA and Indianapolis. (I live in the Dallas area.) I also did one-day trips to some of my bike races including camping out in the Palo Dura Canyon in North west Texas. (The picture of me is in a tent at that race called "24 hours in the Canyon".) We did a 2 man 12 hour team bike race from midnight Saturday until noon Sunday. I then drove 6 hours back to Dallas and went to work the next day!
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Ron Harvot - Name: Ron Harvot
- Who do you know with myeloma?: Myself
- When were you/they diagnosed?: Feb 2009
- Age at diagnosis: 56
Re: Lifestyle and financial planning?
I'm new to multiple myeloma, and in an entirely different circumstance, but am still faced with how to manage financial issues. I was self-employed for most of my working life, but even then made sacrifices in income in order to do some travel.
In your shoes, I would probably take steps to see where your family could economize so you and your wife sometimes, and the whole family other times, could take some extra long weekends - or a couple weeks - or a few weeks. I realize how tricky it is with clients. It's not just about loss of income, but being available when they need you, etc. But - I would imagine there are ways you could gradually find a way to incorporate more vacation time without taking too hard a hit financially, or feeling as though you are compromising your family's future.
That might also ease some of the stress you're finding in not having the same enjoyment in your work.
As the old saying goes, 'No man on his deathbed ever said I should have spent more time on my business.'
In your shoes, I would probably take steps to see where your family could economize so you and your wife sometimes, and the whole family other times, could take some extra long weekends - or a couple weeks - or a few weeks. I realize how tricky it is with clients. It's not just about loss of income, but being available when they need you, etc. But - I would imagine there are ways you could gradually find a way to incorporate more vacation time without taking too hard a hit financially, or feeling as though you are compromising your family's future.
That might also ease some of the stress you're finding in not having the same enjoyment in your work.
As the old saying goes, 'No man on his deathbed ever said I should have spent more time on my business.'
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moonscape - Who do you know with myeloma?: me
- When were you/they diagnosed?: 11/2015
Re: Lifestyle and financial planning?
Hi Dave and All, I would just like to add to the other's posting that probably you can find a way to still enjoy life and yet continue in your career at some level. After all, your family wants you to be with them for a long time, so you will probably have to make some l adjustments to your lifestyle.
I am fortunate in that my children are grown up now and out on their own, and that my husband is our primary wage earner. However, I do work part time with him, from home. I found that getting back to my work as I was undergoing strong treatments, especially in the first year after dx, was helpful in keeping me focussed. The first ten months or so after dx was rough, since I was injured with vertebral compression fractures, took induction chemo and then an auto stem cell transplant then. But after that, we started to travel and enjoy life again, and actually I have travelled MORE in the last few years than ever before. Have been to many Canadian and American cities and also to Spain, France, Maui and Australia, to conference meetings, family visits and just holidaying. We are trying to go once a year to some where we have never been before...next year probably Montreal or St. John's, Nfld..
So I think it is important to try to get the myeloma under control, and work out one's financial life, but also to try to enjoy your life as it goes along.
I am fortunate in that my children are grown up now and out on their own, and that my husband is our primary wage earner. However, I do work part time with him, from home. I found that getting back to my work as I was undergoing strong treatments, especially in the first year after dx, was helpful in keeping me focussed. The first ten months or so after dx was rough, since I was injured with vertebral compression fractures, took induction chemo and then an auto stem cell transplant then. But after that, we started to travel and enjoy life again, and actually I have travelled MORE in the last few years than ever before. Have been to many Canadian and American cities and also to Spain, France, Maui and Australia, to conference meetings, family visits and just holidaying. We are trying to go once a year to some where we have never been before...next year probably Montreal or St. John's, Nfld..
So I think it is important to try to get the myeloma under control, and work out one's financial life, but also to try to enjoy your life as it goes along.
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Nancy Shamanna - Name: Nancy Shamanna
- Who do you know with myeloma?: Self and others too
- When were you/they diagnosed?: July 2009
10 posts
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