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In remission and always worried

by Annamaria on Thu Jan 09, 2014 5:35 am

Ciao from Rome. We Italians do not have a site specific on myeloma and as my English allows me to communicate with you I joined this marvelous one.

I was diagnosed in April 2012 at the age of 58, after experiencing back pain, weight loss, tachycardia and exhaustion due to low hemoglobin . After a few months of Velcade and cortisone I was able to go swimming at my beloved pool again. The day I went back I realized that my life had changed for good, it was not resuming the previous life like it happens when you recover from most diseases.

In Dec 2012 I did an ASCT, which gave me all sort of problems with stomach and intestine. I spent Christmas day as part of the 19 days stay in hospital. Horrible experience. My roommate received the same drug, Melphalan, and just had a little nausea and nothing else. It is true that we respond in different ways, I could not believe the contrast! When I came out I looked at myself in the mirror: I was extremely thin, with no muscles and no hair, and I said to myself that what I wanted was normal weight, my hair and some muscles.

It happened, a few months after the transplant I looked and behaved as if I was the healthiest person on earth.

With the disease in remission I now lead a normal life, but on the psychological side it is really tough! It annoys me when some people who know about me say” Well, nobody knows how long they will live” “Right”, I think “But you can easily chase the though away and you can hope to live 100 years, I cannot”. I am busy all day but I find that I also have to fight my fear, which is tiring, and maybe that is why I sleep something like 10 hours a day, which never happened before.

Reading your articles and comments makes me feel less lonely. My American husband and my 20 yrs old daughter are supportive, yet only those who are ill understand what being ill means. Ciao for now! :)

Annamaria
Name: Annamaria
Who do you know with myeloma?: I am a patient
When were you/they diagnosed?: April 2012
Age at diagnosis: 58

Re: In remission and always worried

by Joy on Thu Jan 09, 2014 9:49 am

Welcome Annamaria!

I know exactly what you mean about chasing away the fear. This disease does take an emotional toll on us. I find that I have not had a day since my diagnosis where I haven't spent considerable time thinking about it, my health, and my mortality. It's exhausting.

On the positive side, I do try to enjoy each day and I think that overall, many of my days are happier than many people that don't have a disease. Knowing your time is limited, makes time more precious.

That being said, I'd gladly go back to my former oblivious superficial state in exchange for the myeloma to leave. Ha!

Best wishes for continued good health!

Joy
Name: Joy
Who do you know with myeloma?: myself
When were you/they diagnosed?: May 2013
Age at diagnosis: 52

Re: In remission and always worried

by Eliejo on Thu Jan 09, 2014 7:45 pm

One thing to keep myeloma out of my mind was to tell myself, I am still me. Myeloma is a disease I have, not my life. With this in mind it is much easier to not think about myeloma 24/7.

Eliejo

Re: In remission and always worried

by Tom184 on Fri Jan 10, 2014 1:13 pm

Things/activities that have helped me deal with the psychological impact of the myeloma have included reading Victor Frankl's Man's Search for Meaning, my local support group, staying as physically active as realistically possible, and keeping my mind engaged with new activities.

I realize some of this you are already doing, and that there is nothing that is going to take all the "dark" thoughts away. However, even those at times are helpful as they make me re-think what is important in my life.

The very best wishes to you as we all hang in there as they search for a cure.

Tom184
Name: Tom
Who do you know with myeloma?: Me
When were you/they diagnosed?: January 2011
Age at diagnosis: 64

Re: In remission and always worried

by Annamaria on Sat Jan 11, 2014 4:56 pm

Thank you Joy, Eliejo and Tom for your kind and wise words! We are on the same (rocky) boat at it feels nice that we understand each other, we can share information and our thoughts across the ocean.

There does not seem to be any support group here in Rome. A few months ago I attended a one day seminar organized here by the IMF, and while I think Dr. Durie and his wife Susie are fantastic people, being with about a hundred people with multiple myeloma and listening to doctors discussing it all day was too much, it took me two days to get over the depression.

There are some associations which provide free psychological help and once a week I see a young psychologist specialized in oncology patients, it gives me some relief.

You know Tom, I think you are right in saying that engaging the mind in new activities could help, I want to try and do that. When we do something new the brain is involved in learning and memorizing and the intensity of this process should be useful in replacing the sad thoughts with neutral or positive ones. I will let you know if it works!

So…bye for now!

Annamaria
Name: Annamaria
Who do you know with myeloma?: I am a patient
When were you/they diagnosed?: April 2012
Age at diagnosis: 58


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