My Myelomaverse: Hygge, Houseplants, And Well-Being, Oh My!
Since the pandemic began, I’ve been spending my days at home on my half-acre property, which I long ago nicknamed ‘SoFUH,’ which stands for Sokol Family Urban Homestead.
When I’m not out working the land, and by that I mean dead-heading rhododendrons, fuchsias, and geraniums, pulling weeds, or picking green beans and chard, I can be found inside either messing up or cleaning up the kitchen, perched on the sofa videoconferencing with loved ones, corresponding, reading, researching, or mending.
When that got old, I found myself looking around my house, anticipating the long, soggy, cold days of the Pacific Northwest winter and wondering how that’s going to go.
At the beginning of the pandemic, a friend loaned me the “Little Book of Hygge: Danish Secrets to Happy Living.” According to author Meik Wiking, hygge (pronounced hyoo-guh) is a concept that involves gathering with friends, enjoying good food, and being comfortable and cozy. Multiple well-placed unscented candles, house plants, and lots of cozy textiles along with gathering with small groups of friends and enjoying simple good food is what creates hygge, according to the book. “The true essence of hygge is the pursuit of everyday happiness and it’s basically like a hug, just without the physical touch,” Wiking writes. How fitting for these physically distanced pandemic times.
So suffice it to say that I am taking the threat of a long, soggy, dark, and lonely winter seriously. But hygge could be the antidote!
With togetherness removed from the equation and sufficient candles on hand, naturally my thoughts turned to house plants. I became obsessed. I tried to buy some, sight unseen, via phone, from the local nursery, but that was a disaster. The kind person who helped me must have thought I lived in an office building. No, that ball of a ficus on a braided trunk wasn’t going to work with the vibe I was trying to create.
But then I discovered all sorts of plants for sale online, and before I knew it, I had launched head first down a botanic rabbit hole. Next thing I knew, I was the overwhelmed owner of not one, but two very large house plants that arrived from Pennsylvania via Fed Ex in giant boxes, miraculously still alive.
I’m not sure what I was thinking. Under the influence of the threat of a lonely, stormy, dark winter looming on the horizon, ample time on my hands, a laptop at my fingertips, and hygge on my mind, I had chosen two five- to six-foot trees, thinking that of course they wouldn’t be as tall as the advertised height. But by golly, the six-footers arrived, looking just like the fake ones they sell at Ikea for ten times less, without the mess of real dirt, yards of brown paper and packing tape, and the need for water.
Now I’m looking around my house trying to find a suitable spot where the plants actually contribute to the hygge, rather than remind me of a disturbing mosquito and ant infested jungle episode of the TV series "Naked and Afraid."
As ridiculous as my plant-buying episode may sound, this is one of my ways of preparing to hunker down. I believe that we’re in this pandemic for the long haul. Even when a vaccine becomes available, I suspect it will take a while for active immunity to take place in the community on the level to make it ‘safe’ for us myeloma folks to resume some semblance of our pre-Covid-19 lives. It is time to prepare for a long hibernation. Many of our previous ways of living and coping are not possible right now. So many things, including multiple myeloma, are beyond our control. But we can control how we cultivate our self-care and maximize our well-being, and that looks different for everyone.
For me, part of that is creating a cozy, comforting, and pleasing environment that I can retreat to after cold, soggy walks, stressful doctor appointments, or during hard days. For you, it may be something completely different.
Maybe I’ll even start hugging my hygge trees.
May we all go from strength to strength!
Else Sokol is a multiple myeloma patient and columnist here at The Myeloma Beacon. Her column is published once a month.
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I often think of responding to the wonderful articles that all the columnists here write, but I have not done it as yet – until now! Multiple myeloma is the pits, and I strive to look at things from the positive side rather than the negative even when I feel crummy so much of the time. Your article brought a smile to my face. Thanks for sharing your thoughts and lovely writing style with us!
I am one who loves to find laughter in the darkest places, and your description of the trees was awesome.
Thanks Else! I enjoyed your light-hearted column on how to prepare for winter during a pandemic. My husband and I love winter: a wood-burning stove, hot chocolate, and if we are lucky, a few inches of snow. Since we live in the mountains, our summers are filled with temporary residents and tourists. It is in winter that we get to have calm and quiet. As for house plants, I bring four large pots of geraniums into the house in order to “winter” them inside. They don’t retain their flowers, but they do stay green all winter.
I live in south Florida, where winter is a wish, just a cool-down is welcome without the heavy humidity. I have a small garden with cuttings I find on walks during cooler days, and planting them makes me forget for a short time about multiple myeloma.
Your wintry days ahead sound delicious and cozy, befriended by plants. Delightful writing.
Dear Else, Thanks for the nice column, full of hope and hygge! I suppose that in Denmark it is a long, cold winter too, just as it is here. We have a greenhouse attached to the house and the geraniums in it bloom year round. I don't even put them outdoors in the summer any more. And I find that succulents such as a giant cactus, a jade plant, and an aloe are quite happy there, since they get sunshine. I would like to plant some indoor bulbs such as narcissus and amaryllis too, since they will bloom indoors, as well as some outdoor bulbs, such as daffodils, for spring.