Myeloma Dispatches: Gifts From The Desert
The sky is big and blue with gauzy clouds, and the hillsides populated with strange shapes of cacti and spiky grasses. This is the Organ Pipe Cactus National Monument near the border between Arizona and Mexico. I was struck by the harsh alien beauty. We camped three nights there, hiked, attended ranger talks at night, and learned lots about the cacti. The night was quiet and dark because of the distance from towns. Every campsite was bordered by its own large cactus.
At the end of our stay, I realized that I hadn’t thought about multiple myeloma at all. For all of my fellow cancer patients, you know what a gift that is. The lesson for me was a change of scenery is a powerful healing tool.
In January, we traveled around Arizona for two weeks, camping, hiking, and sightseeing. The main attraction for my husband was the Arizona Mineral and Gem show. This event is the biggest of its kind in the world. Mark’s passion is minerals and how to create beauty with Earth’s treasures.
My goal was different. I wanted to take a recess from my multiple myeloma treatment. I had negotiated an extra week off the Darzalex (daratumumab), Velcade (bortezomib) and dexamethasone (Decadron) treatment regimen. Since September of last year, I have been going twice a week to the local cancer center for treatment. The disease is always right in front of me.
When we travel in our sweet pop-up camper, exploring new country, we do not think or talk about my cancer as much. It’s truly the break that refreshes. That was the first gift of the desert.
The Sonoran Desert is known for its harsh climate and strange, almost alien landscape. I am used to the Rocky Mountains of Colorado with snow-capped mountains and huge forests of evergreens. In the Organ Pipe Cactus National Monument, the large cacti appeared otherworldly to me. Organ pipe cacti have large, spindly arms that attach at the bottom to the desert floor. The image is either a desert octopus for some, or organ pipes for others. They are huge, some over 8 or 9 feet tall. Yet the cacti are vulnerable to freezing, so this area in Southern Arizona, with its dry, hot heat, is the perfect climate for them to flourish.
Besides the organ pipe cacti, there is a diverse collection of other cacti, including the huge, tree-like saguaro. It was fun looking at all of them and trying to identify the species. Both the saguaro and the organ pipe have a green skin that covers a woody skeleton, a hidden strength. The woody structure is used for firewood and even shade buildings. I used the cactus as a metaphor for myself. Sure, I appear more frail, changed by multiple myeloma, but I am still tough and resilient. You may not see my strength, just like I couldn’t see the hidden, woody supports of the giant green saguaro.
We also traveled to the high desert of the Navajo tribal lands. There, in Monument Valley, is where many of the iconic westerns, especially those by John Ford, were filmed. The cliffs are deep shades of red, formed by the tectonic uplift of the Colorado Plateau after the Dinosaur Age. Crafted by time, wind, and water, the buttes have become gigantic monoliths that stand in a relatively barren landscape. This is Navajo land, and development has been limited to the edges of the tribal park.
For a fee, you can drive a 17-mile loop to circle around the towering buttes, such as Totem Pole, Mitten Buttes, or John Ford point. At times, the landscape is overwhelming, and words are inadequate to capture its beauty. During that hour-long ride, I was able to stay in the present, with no thoughts of the past or the future. I experienced a familiar bubble of joy; the bubble of being grateful to be alive. Gratitude was another gift of the desert.
The images of the Sonoran Desert and the red sandstone Monument Valley have stayed with me. I returned to treatment this week, and the first day was five hours long. Yet I slowed my breathing, closed my eyes, and revisited the sights of the desert.
I am grateful that this treatment regimen allowed me to experience the desert.
Maureen Nuckols is a multiple myeloma patient and columnist at The Myeloma Beacon. You can view a list of her previously published columns here.
If you are interested in writing a regular column for The Myeloma Beacon, please contact the Beacon team at .
Maureen,
I am so happy that you are doing better and got a break from treatment to enjoy the cactus and camping in Arizona. The break from fretting over cancer is priceless. I hope you can repeat this type of break many times over.
Dear Maureen, I loved reading your column. I had similar experiences of joy when we managed to go walking in Australia. Being in lovely places close to nature allows me to fill up with happiness and forget about myeloma for a while. Best wishes and good luck to you.
Hey Maureen,
Wow, what a great trip. I want to do that too! You have heightened my love of cacti! Need to put that adventure on my pedestal list (refuse to call it my bucket list!). Nice writing. Beautiful!
Wonderful story, Maureen. We share your love of the West and the incredible beauty of the desert. It was nice that you could take a short break from your treatments and feel "normal." I pray that your treatments continue to be beneficial for you and that your travels be safe.
Maureen, This is a beautiful description of your trip to the desert and the mineral and gem show. it sounds very special! We saw large cacti like that when we went to Tempe last November. The whole area was interesting. We were there to watch an ironman competition. The giant cacti were out in the desert near a shopping mall! I hope that your treatments are working well, so that you can get more breaks too!
Dear Maureen,
I have several women in my life that I look to for example, mentoring, and inspiration. My sister-in-law for parenting. My Aunt Helen for character and love. And, after reading your columns for many months, you for how to live with multiple myeloma.
I was diagnosed 2 years ago at the age of 59 and ran the New York City half marathon 7 months after my stem cell transplant. My husband and I just returned from an amazing 2 weeks in Costa Rica. I went from a size 12 to a size 6, but I will hold onto your image of hidden strength –truly I feel that my time fighting this disease has made me so strong.
Thank you for your columns. They give me more quiet strength – a groundedness in how to ignore and battle multiple myeloma.
Sending love to you,
Rebecca
Dear Maureen,
I loved your column! And, I'm so happy you had such a great break. You wrote a wonderful reminder of the value of enjoying nature. And, I really like your idea of recalling your visit during the infusion. That would be very calming. Thank you.
First of all, readers, I want to apologize for my tardiness in replying to your comments. I have been felled by influenza B, down for the count for the last 5 days. But I am better and ready to respond.
Dear Sylvia - I am glad you agree with my connection with nature. It keeps me focused, particularly on long infusions day.
Dear Rebecca - How your words touched me. Your journey began at a younger age – I was 66, and you were 59. I am amazed at what you accomplished in a brief time. Keep setting those goals. Although they may change, the goals do help me to keep going. I also find I like reading sport stories because the story features an athlete who faces challenges with tenacity and determination. Your own story gives me strength.
Dear Nancy - When we were traveling, we were lucky to meet so many Canadians. What a friendly bunch you are!
Dear Patty B - I am glad we share the love of the West and its beauty. The breaks from treatment are what make the treatment worthwhile.
Dear friend Rae - Yes, you would love this desert adventure, but first you have to complete your next big adventure, the grand horse drive in Colorado.
Dear Marjorie - I love your description, "to fill up with happiness and forget about myeloma." You truly get it.
Dear Ron - Thanks for your kind words. We are planning our next break as we speak. You are right: "breaks from fretting". Priceless.
Maureen
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