Mohr’s Myeloma Musings: Practicing Gratitude
The holiday season is rapidly approaching. The changing colors of the leaves on trees remind us that we will soon be bombarded with Black Friday advertisements. I was surprised during a recent visit to a department store to find that Christmas decorations are already on the shelves.
It is so easy to get caught up in the hustle and bustle of this season and lose sight of the meaning of the first holiday of the season, Thanksgiving Day, which our Canadian neighbors already celebrated earlier this month. Having an attitude of gratitude can be pushed aside by the commercialization that has become synonymous with this day.
If and when you have an opportunity during the hustle and bustle of the next month to consider what you can and should be thankful for, don't forget your medical team.
Consider this a very early version of my Thanksgiving Day thoughts.
I am thankful for:
My primary care doctor, who chose not to write off my initial hip pain as arthritis – which I suspected it was – but ordered an x-ray and then referred me to my cancer center. He also monitored me closely during a period when it seemed like I was suffering from upper respiratory infections every six weeks during the early phases of my multiple myeloma.
The bone marrow biopsy team, who made what could have been an uncomfortable, painful process into nothing worse than a routine visit to the dentist.
The young radiology technicians, who guided me through the 25 radiation treatments with a youthful energy that quickly erased any concerns I had about my initial treatment of the disease. Playing Shania Twain songs helped greatly.
The imaging technicians, who kindly reminded me to not move during the PET scans when lying perfectly still for 45 minutes became almost too much to stand.
The staff on the chemotherapy floor, who made my monthly Zometa (zoledronic acid) infusion appointments uneventful because they could always find a vein and insert the needle effortlessly, not something to take lightly from one who has a mild phobia of needles.
The nurses who start my three-month checkups with the preliminary work (height, weight, blood draw) before I see the nurse practitioner or my doctor, and who review my instructions with me at the conclusion of the appointment.
My nurse practitioner, who has been at my medical center since my diagnosis. It is comforting to work with someone who has been there since the start of my multiple myeloma journey.
The cleaning staff on the transplant floor. Regardless of who was cleaning my room, they greeted me cheerily each morning during my stem cell transplant, chatting with me when I wanted to chat, and recognizing when I was not in a conversational mood. Their attention to detail was amazing.
The nursing aides on the transplant floor who, despite the most unpleasant of tasks, never left my room without asking me if there was anything else they could do for me.
The nurses on the transplant floor, who my doctor said were the experts to listen to during the stem cell transplant, and who certainly went beyond that expectation.
My oncologist, an expert in his field, who, despite the fact that I am probably one of the lowest risk patient he deals with, treats my every question and minor issue with genuine concern.
As I gave thought to this column, I was surprised at the number of people who make up my medical team, as well as the different skill sets that they each possess. As is true for multiple myeloma patients everywhere, my care has been in the hands of a large team. It will likely continue to be so unless a miracle cure is found soon.
Melody Beattie, a respected American author of self-help books who has survived abandonment, kidnapping, sexual abuse, drug and alcohol addiction, divorce, and the death of a child, states that gratitude "turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos into order, confusion into clarity ... Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today, and creates vision for tomorrow.”
Multiple myeloma certainly creates chaos and confusion in our lives. We all have probably gone through periods of denial about our situation and experienced times when we cannot make sense of why we are afflicted with this disease.
I believe what Melody Beattie has written is true, and I will try to foster an attitude of gratitude, being grateful on a daily basis for the group that easily can be taken for granted, but which my very existence relies on: my medical team.
Steve Mohr is a multiple myeloma patient and columnist here at The Myeloma Beacon. His column is published once a month. You can view a list of his columns here.
If you are interested in writing a regular column for The Myeloma Beacon, please contact the Beacon team at .
Above all, be grateful for what you can still do, not sad for what you can't. Every day is a new challenge.
You made my day, Steve. What a great, thoughtful article. How easy it is to forget the tremendous impact all these people have made in our lives. Thank you!
Thanks for this column about gratitude and how you have experienced many positive experiences while undergoing treatments for myeloma. I also have been seeing many of the same people at the cancer centre during the last seven years, and like to talk with them too. The pleasant staff in all areas of the medical world make this journey much more bearable!
Thank you for a really thoughtful column. I have a large number of medical people on my team and I am grateful for all of them. Without them there is no telling where I would be today. Thanks for the reminder.
A lovely little book also is "Gratitude" by Oliver Sacks written shortly before he died. I am grateful for so many daily things, small & simple.
Suzanne Gay
Amen
Bob - Wise words!
Jim - The inspiration for this topic came to me during my last 3-month checkup after touring the new transplant floor at my cancer center. While the autologous stem cell transplant was brutal, there were many positive memories of the complete care I received then and what I receive now. It is so easy to forget what my medical team has done, and does for me, because I only see them 4 times a year.
Nancy - We really do develop relationships with our medical team over the years of treatments and check ups.
Joyce - I appreciate your kind comment and, as dottiek would say, "Amen" to your comment on not knowing where we would be today without our medical team.
Suzanne - I will have to check that book out. The small and simple things seem to become bigger, more enjoyable, and more profound with each year of surviving this disease.
Dottiek - I appreciate your comment.
Thank you for another thoughtful article, Steve. I really try in the morning and evening to identify a minimum of 3 things that I am thankful for. The timing of your column is meaningful because with a chronic disease we cannot take life for granted. I also have had many of the same team members for the last 5 years. As a nurse, I am glad that you also appreciate the role of different nurses on the cancer team. Three of the nurses on my medical team are also former students of mine from when I was a professor of nursing. This is bittersweet with the reversal of roles.
Maureen
Steve,
All good points, the medical team is like a second family to all of us !
Thanks Steve! Such a wonderful reminder to all of us what is important in our lives. And especially so for multiple myeloma patients. We sure do use a vast array of medical specialists in the diagnosis and treatment of myeloma. Very important in your article is the need to be grateful for all the support staff. I remember in my Army training an axiom regarding logistics - it takes 10 support personnel to enable 1 soldier. In the fight against myeloma, I would guess the ratio is even greater. It is hard to believe that the holidays are nearly upon us and the time to reflect on all that we are grateful for. Thanks for getting us started this year.
Maureen - Like you, I have had many of the same medical team members since being diagnosed over 4 years ago. It is comforting to see familiar faces in what can sometimes be anxious situations.
Jack - I appreciate your kind comments and know that the value of having a close relationship with our medical team is hard to quantify.
PattyB - I really like your comparison to the Army. When I look at the number of people who have been involved in my care and treatment since diagnosis, it literally is in the dozens. Unfortunately, it is impossible to personally thank each and every one of them.
Progress toward fundraising goal
for all of 2020:
15%
For more information, see the Beacon's
"2020 Fundraising: Goals And Updates" page