Northern Lights: Stress Busters
I have been living with multiple myeloma for almost six years now, and I am grateful that, after a period of initial treatment, I have had the opportunity to get back to a nearly normal life again.
You might think that, after such a long time, I needn’t worry about the future, or become stressed about the disease sometimes, but that is not always the case.
My relapse last autumn and subsequent return to treatment on the strongest dosage of Revlimid (lenalidomide) plus weekly dexamethasone (Decadron) was a reminder that I am not immortal.
However, I have activities that I turn to for relaxation if I get worried about myeloma – or anything else in my life.
As I mentioned in my last column, I like to exercise, and do some daily. Especially when our family dog is with me and I can listen to music through my cell phone, walking is really relaxing for me.
Music has been an important stress buster throughout my life. Since my myeloma diagnosis, I can find more meaning in the nuances of both sad ballads and happy songs. Music is an emotional outlet for me that way.
Earlier in my life, I played bagpipes, an instrument I learned to play in my childhood, regularly with a pipe band. But I had to give up playing with the band in parades after having back injuries due to myeloma. Fortunately, I had switched over more to singing and had already been a member of a multicultural choir for years prior to my myeloma diagnosis. So the disease didn’t force me to give up performing music in a group.
Another way I can lose myself in the moment is to work on textile crafts – a pastime I share with my mother and stepmother. The nice thing about this hobby is that it is so versatile. I can do something as uncomplicated as taking a small knitting project with me while waiting for medical appointments, or work at home on a bigger, more complicated piece that takes a lot of concentration. I completed some of the bigger, more complicated pieces when I was at home recovering from treatment.
My husband Dilip and I both enjoy gardening, both inside and outside the house. There is something about the seasons passing by that I find relaxing. Every spring is a new awakening of nature, and I am thrilled to still be here to observe that. Right after my stem cell transplant, in 2010, I couldn’t work with my houseplants for fear of getting a fungal infection. I have found that now I enjoy repotting and trimming and fertilizing plants, when before I might have found that to be more of a chore.
On weekends, it’s nice to get together with family and friends for a meal or some sort of outing. It reminds me how far I have come since my diagnosis, when I stayed home a lot and was not able to be with as many people as I would have liked. When we are tired, Dilip and I may just stay home and watch a movie on TV. Weekends are also a good time to get more outdoor exercise or go to the fitness club.
My mother, my two sisters, and I have also been playing online scrabble together nonstop since 2006. I continued to play during my induction therapy and stem cell transplant because it was a nice way to stay in touch and to immerse myself into the world of words. I continue to look forward to my daily turn, which hopefully has improved my vocabulary, too.
Reading a good book also helps me get my thoughts off my worries. Through my myeloma diagnosis, I have rediscovered how much I enjoy reading up on medical-related topics and biology. As a result – and following up on a tip from a fellow Beacon reader – I started auditing some classes in biology last spring. Because I was a microbiology major back in my university days, somehow reading up on these topics turns back the clock for me to my time as a student.
So, all in all, I feel that I have enough relaxing activities to turn to when stress threatens to get the better of me. I don’t want to be worried unnecessarily and miss out on enjoying my life as it continues to unfold. I can’t be very effective, or helpful to others, if I get overwhelmed with worries, and I live a full life in the present day.
What are some of the activities that you turn to for relaxation?
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The quotation for this month is from Leonardo da Vinci (1452 – 1519), the Italian polymath, who said: “Every now and then go away, have a little relaxation, for when you come back to your work, your judgment will be surer.”
Nancy Shamanna is a multiple myeloma patient and a columnist at The Myeloma Beacon. You can view a list of her columns here.
If you are interested in writing a regular column to be published by The Myeloma Beacon, please contact the Beacon team at .
Thank you Nancy that was a great column. You have really underscored how important it is to try and lead a normal life to help take you mind off the disease. You have an incredibly diverse group of activities. The bag pipes! That is one instrument I normally don't think of females playing. Good for you!! I too sing in choir so I can relate with that.
Thanks Ron! I feel fortunate to have these activities in my life. Don't you think that singing is good for one's health. We Beacon readers think of you more from your cycling, but it's great to have music in one's life too. I enjoyed being in a pipe band also, especially playing in the Calgary Stampede Parade for many years, but those days are gone, even for the band I was in! Being in a choir has helped me learn more about music, since we sing a wide variety of songs, from classical to pop to jazz ... very interesting repertoire! My only problem with the choir is that my mild neuropathy in my feet gets worse from standing a long time, especially on risers!
Hi Nancy,
I enjoyed reading your column. I enjoy all of the same things you do! I have a rat terrier that is my constant companion. Walking with her, meeting people through her, and watching the dogs play brings so much joy into my life. I used to ride weekly with my local bike club, but since I got the dog I didn't ride so much, and last year when I found out about the osteoporosis and fractures I became afraid to ride. I am starting to get back into it now. I have a little doggy trailer and sometimes I put the dog in there and take her with me. I haven't tried riding with the club again yet. I'm not sure if I can keep up but I want to try soon. I read about a cycling challenge for the month of June, where you log in your miles and donate to children's cancer research. I think I will participate in that. Having cancer in your 60's is OK. My kids are grown, my husband is retired, we have what we need. No children should have to endure grueling chemo.
I am a professional violinist and music also usually takes my mind of of my disease. I was diagnosed exactly a year ago. I have not had SCT yet, and I am hoping to take a watch and wait approach instead. I'm meeting with my doctor to discuss that this Friday. At first, I was miserable thinking I would not be able to play at all any more, or not as well, because of back pain. The back pain is still there, but I am learning to live with it. It's only as bad as a mild sunburn, or bruises. At the end of the day my back feels like someone has been pounding on it. It's always better in the morning. I am going to play with my symphony again in April after taking a year and a half off. I did enjoy teaching children to play violin and that would also be a good way to take my mind off of myself. But here is another thing I have in common with you. We have a second home in the north, on Bainbridge Island. It was a long time dream of my husband's to retire in the northwest. Having two houses is fun, but makes it hard to keep up with a regular teaching schedule, so I retired. I have my own string quartet and trio business. I love playing in small ensembles with my friends. It is my favorite way to make music. Living in the Napa / Somona area is great for weddings. We keep busy every weekend from April through October.
I also love to work with fabric. I enjoy making quilts and I have enjoyed crocheting too. I think I would enjoy gardening also. When my son got married 5 years ago, I decided to make our garden beautiful for the guests that would be visiting. I would spend about an hour watering, weeding and pruning first thing in the morning. It was a great way to start the day. Now that we have two houses, we have hired gardeners and I find I have lost some interest in the garden.
I also love to play words with friends. It's how I unwind at night. Maybe we can play each other. It sounds like we really have a lot in common!
Stress sure is a strong, overwhelming emotion and the energy spent / dissipated on stress can be used in so many better ways. Thanks for the great column, Ms. Shamanna. Keep well and keep smiling!
Nancy
Controlling stress is the desire of all of us. Mr. Da Vinci was right when he spoke of using some of our precious time for relaxation. It helps us focus ourselves and we can continue stronger. Another wise man, Solomon, made the following comment at Eccles 3:13, "And also that every man should eat and drink, and enjoy the good of all his labour, it is the gift of God."
All our stresses need to be tempered with fine music, family, enjoyable distractions so we can live our life to the best for us and those who love us. Thanks for your experiences and what works for you, as it gives the MM community more insight in how to deal successfully with the reality our our illness.
Peg - I know we do have a lot in common. I admire professional musicians and am glad to hear you could get back to your quartet and trio. Playing at weddings must be very uplifting; we had live music as well as a talented DJ at our older daughter's wedding last September. I have always liked stitching, knitting, quilting too, and have way too many UFO's (unfinished objects) to work on! I also enjoy dog walking and spending time with the canines! Piper is not my dog - he belongs to our younger daughter and her husband, but since they are both busy during the day, I look after him quite a bit, and really like doing that. Does your dog like music? Ours will sit under a desk when I am doing my practising and listen! The biking works for me but just with Dilip, and I don't use clip in pedals since I am scared of overbalancing and falling, although so far so good with that not happening!
Namaste Upasana - Thanks for your kind note. Hope you are well. Are you writing in from India? We have family there, in Bangalore.
Eric - Glad you liked the Da Vinci quote. He still speaks to us from over 600 years ago, and was probably also influenced by Ecclesiastes. Did you know that the oldest lyrics of a pop song are from Ecclesiastes 3:1-8 . 'Turn, turn, turn' , adapted by Pete Seeger in the late 1950's, was made an international hit in 1965 by The Byrds. 'To everything, turn, turn, turn, there is a season, turn , turn, turn....'. It is a beautiful, profound song.
Hi Nancy, thanks for another great column!
One of my challenges is finding the right balance between thinking about and learning about multiple myeloma and doing the other things that are "ordinary life" for me.
I think that in some ways learning about multiple myeloma is a stress reducer for me because understanding it better makes it less frightening to me. Also there's sort of an intellectual curiosity that takes over for me. In a weird way, I'm often able to step into a scientist role and out of the patient role when reading about it.
Like you, I've also enjoyed trying to learn a little biology as background to what I'm reading about multiple myeloma (although I am afraid I might be over my head in the latest EdX Molecular Biology course, even after the just first lecture).
And connecting with people in the Myeloma Beacon community is a stress reducer for me because it helps me see that I am not alone.
That said, all of those activities are nevertheless connected to multiple myeloma in some way, and there's some underlying stress associated with that. So for me, it's not an all or nothing thing when it comes to stress with those activities. They help me, but I do need to step away from them and try to keep things balanced with the other things in life.
Exercise, especially running, is a key stress reducer for me, going back over 40 years now.
And music is big for me too, mostly listening to it until I retired about a year ago. Since then I've been trying to learn to play the trombone. Our younger dog is the opposite of yours - she is afraid to go down to our basement where I practice. Too many strange sounds coming out of there for her!
Thanks again for another helpful and thought-provoking column!
Mike
Excellent column Nancy. Having just finished up my tandem ASCT in December and off work for 6 weeks, I am back to work and thankful to be able to rejoin my pharmacy team at my job. I am in CR now and am extremely happy for that. The challenge that I face is rejoining life again. Yes, I want to read and learn as much about mm as I can -- some of the new immune treatments, drugs, and vaccine therapies on the horizon really fascinate me as a pharmacist. However, I also need to de-stress for a time. I told my myeloma specialist last week that I was going to let him do the studying and reading for awhile and I was going to live life making new memories while I had time. He said that is exactly what I needed to do! I just won't let my guard down, however.
Dear Ms. Shamanna,
Namaste! Glad to learn that you have family here in India. I am based here in Rajasthan, Jaipur. I am doing alright, praying all the while for my Papa, who has had his ASCT in Gurgaon recently. I have not seen him for more than a month now. Waiting for him to get back home and at the same time praying that God continues to be with us and gives more health and wellbeing to Papa and our family. Really glad to learn you have connections with my country. If you don't mind me observing, i reckon your husband is also Indian, right ( i can see he has a Hindi name) ? Anyhow, pleasure to connect with people who like Mr. Burns remarked do not let you feel alone in this big big challenge...
Lots of wishes to you and your family. God bless you with health and happiness, now and always.
Upasana
Greetings Nancy! Your wonderful column emphasizes the use of our creative, intuitive right brain to balance all the logical, intellectual stimuli of our lives. Especially when faced with a dis-ease like ours, it is crucial to find an equilibration. I share a love of music, art and its history, and inspired reading and poetry. For me, nature and wilderness exploration opens a thin veil to communing with Spirit, and whatever name people use for the All. We look forward to visiting Canmore and Calgary starting tomorrow. Namasté, Jan
Thanks Mike for your comments! I have gradually, but not always in a steady continuum, gotten back to a lot of my previous life, except that I am now almost six years older! The first year or two after the diagnosis, I was quite consumed with my illness psychologically, but then again, I was injured, taking strong treatments, and a bit depressed about the whole scenario. So anyone who is able to function normally has my respect!
I started reading the 'Molecular Biology class on Tuesday, and IMO, it is at post graduate level. The idea of crystallographers seeing the DNA double helix as a 'hand', where there is a 'major groove' and a 'minor groove' was a new concept to me. Then to be asked in the first question set to determine the binding of the oxygen, nitrogen, hydrogen and carbon, using the electron acceptors was way over my head too! But since I am just auditing, I will try to read it and get something out of that. I doubt I could pass a class like that though.
BTW, the little dog of ours likes singing, but hates bagpipes! He barks and howls if I try to practise indoors. i think that dog's hearing is sensitive and they have certain pitches and resonances that they don't like. So I have to play my pipes outdoors when he is around!
Hi Randy, I think you are finding a good balance again in life. Others writing and posting on the Beacon have cautioned people not to jump back into one's previous life too energetically though. You still need time to rest and recover from a stem cell transplant, let along a double transplant! With your educational and professional background, it should be easy for you to sort out the medicine and biology behind the new advances in myeloma research, and maybe we will read Forum postings from you also, and comments on the scientific articles published here, since I am sure you would have a lot to contribute.
Upasana,
Āpakē pitā nē apanē sṭēma sēla pratyārōpaṇa sē ēka tējī sē vasūlī karatā hai ki um'mīda hai.
(Hoping that your father makes a speedy recovery from his stem cell transplant.)
You are a good caregiver to be sending such positive thoughts his way. if you have specific questions about the recovery, or his treatments, best to post to the Forum, for there are many knowledgeable patients, caregivers and doctors who care to answer medical questions.
Yes, Dilip did grow up in India, but moved here as a young PhD student in the 1970s. I worked with him on his thesis in a microbiology lab, 'd Xylose Catabolism of Salmonella Typhimurim'. He became a Canadian too and we married have lived in Calgary together ever since! So we can keep in touch with our cousins in India but it is difficult now to travel there, with my low immunities.
Namaste Jan! Dilip and I are looking forward to meeting with you and your family next week! That will be so nice to chat in person.
You are exactly right about finding time for rest and relaxation, allowing my body time to rebuild itself. I notice by the end of a long week that I am a lot more tired than I ever used to be. Since I was a former football player and athlete, I had always had a lot of endurance and strength. Not so much anymore. Maybe at 61 years of age, that is OK also. Taking time to stop and smell the roses is not only a very good song but also a nice life goal. I will be posting things as I run across them that I feel have merit and worth sharing with everyone.
Thanks a bunch for the good wishes, Ms. Shamanna! And my mother gets to be the caregiver for Papa, technically speaking. However, all of us in the family would do all we can to provide care to Papa, which he does not really expect us to, and is rather more concerned with our nitty-gritties of life. But then thats what family is about, loving and caring for each other, come what may. Isn't it?
Thanks Randy and Upasana for your thoughtful comments. It is helpful to be able to discuss myeloma issues online with other patients and caregivers too!
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