The end of the year provides a great time for review and reflection.

2012 has been a momentous one for me in my journey with myeloma. It included both difficult and awe-inspiring moments.

I went off chemotherapy in February in preparation for a stem cell transplant. I have not been back on it since then. No more exciting steroid “highs” - but no more steroid rages ^[1] either!

In early March, I underwent a stem cell transplant ^[2]. I lost my remaining hair. I recently stumbled across a draft email I had written but never sent from one of my more difficult days in the hospital. The email describes a fruitless attempt to learn how to use a bedside commode. I had thankfully totally forgotten this (and most other details) of my three-week hospital stay.

Through my hospital stay, I became deeply aware and appreciative of the nursing profession. Up until my diagnosis with myeloma, I had been a pretty healthy person and didn’t know much about nursing. The care and compassion I was given at the hospital in my “hour of need” was beyond comprehension to me.

2012 was also the year I became utterly in awe of the advances in medical science that have taken place in my lifetime. As I recovered from the stem cell transplant, I studied up on the history of cancer research, and then on the development of bone and stem cell transplants. The depth of knowledge on a cellular level of what goes on in the human body is far beyond my ability to understand. The techniques involved in prompting a patient’s bone marrow to regenerate with his or her own blood cells are fantastic beyond imagination.

After I emerged from the hospital with my newly minted bone marrow in late March, I found new joy in life’s simple pleasures. Sitting in a sun-filled room in my own apartment after three weeks in a monochrome hospital room was pure delight. Walking two blocks over to the Hudson River and watching the sun glitter on the water was a treat beyond any previously imagined. My stamina steadily improved, and by the end of May, I could walk (with rests) for over an hour.

In June, I returned to the gym. For the past three years, exercise has been a great mood stabilizer and mood elevator for me that I used to cope with the myeloma and my retirement. I have come to deeply believe in endorphins, those chemicals that are supposed to be released into the brain by exercise. Nothing else can explain my improved mood after my visits to the swimming pool. By mid-July, I was swimming for half-hour stints. Not fast, but much of my stamina was continuing to return.

In August I joined Medicare. Strangers started offering me their seat on the subway (and no, I’m not showing them my senior citizen transportation card!). My wife and I also took what seemed to be the best vacation we had ever taken: We traveled to Scandinavia. I particularly enjoyed the thermal pools (one in the wild and one in a spa); I also had a few dips into the Baltic Sea. Cold water does great things for my neuropathy. Eating herring two to three times a day undoubtedly was also good for my overall health.

On the eve of Halloween 2012, Hurricane Sandy blew through New York ^[3]. Electric power and telephones went out in lower Manhattan. The power came back for us five days later, but tens of thousands of New Yorkers were displaced from their homes. Three of Manhattan’s major hospitals were flooded. They remain closed more than two months after the storm blew through the City. Electric generators and FEMA trucks are still operating on many streets of Manhattan south of Wall Street. Construction crews continue to swarm in and out of the skyscrapers.

Hurricane Sandy was a major marker for me in my myeloma journey. On November 1, two days following the storm, I wended my way up to the hospital for my monthly blood tests, safely navigating the three miles of Manhattan traffic without traffic lights.

Unfortunately, the results that came back the next day were not good. As my wife and I had suspected from the previous two blood test results, the stem cell transplant was not having a long-term impact. The myeloma indicators in my blood were beginning to rise dramatically.

We quickly made an appointment to see my hematologist who reviewed three different courses of treatment with us. Two involved clinical trials, and the third, Kyprolis ^[4](carfilzomib), had been approved by the FDA a few months earlier.

After a couple of days of reviewing the information and the literature that the hematologist provided to us, we decided to try one of the drugs in a clinical trial. It is a monoclonal antibody that has a cancer-killing (cytotoxic) chemical agent attached to it. The antibody is designed to attach to the surface of myeloma cells. When the antibody latches onto the myeloma cell, the chemical agent is released into the cell and kills it. I am scheduled to begin the treatment in mid-January – not soon enough for me!

Over the next few months, I hope to be able to study a high-school biology text book to learn more about the basics behind the treatment. I’ll keep you posted and share more Manhattan Tales with you.

In sum, 2012 was a momentous year for me. Though I’m of course disappointed that the stem cell transplant didn’t have a long-term impact, I remain grateful and optimistic. On to the next battle!

I wish you all a happy and healthy New Year.