Pat’s Cracked Cup: Alchemy
Halloween is in the air. Pumpkins, black cats, ghosts -- a witch in black stirs her cauldron of steaming brew. I am reminded that there is no magic potion for multiple myeloma. “It is easy to get a thousand prescriptions, but hard to get one single remedy,” says the Chinese proverb. Still, each of us with multiple myeloma hopes to stumble upon the perfect alchemy for survival.
There is no sparkling elixir to pour from a bottle -- living is our laboratory. Finding the precise combination of elements for well-being involves effort. Fatalists may say that “what will be, will be.” Others argue that we create our own destiny.
More and more, I welcome luck into the mix -- effort and luck.
Even Steve Jobs faced this task. Despite his good fortune and talent, he was humbled by cancer’s mystery. A new biography about his experience with the disease reveals all the treatments that he explored during his 8-year journey. I hope to read about this someday.
I cringe when I hear the slogan “Live each day as if it were your last.” The idea of a “bucket list” is also troublesome. Are we simply consumers of life racking up points? Our culture tends to highlight miraculous recoveries and dramatic accomplishments. We learn to define ourselves by what is lacking or undone rather than what we can be here and now in ordinary life.
I heard an inspiring story about the Buddhist poet, Allen Ginsberg. After his doctor informed him that he had just days to live, he called all his friends to ask if there was anything he could do for them. Leonard Cohen’s song, “Anthem,” describes this idea beautifully. “Ring the bells that still can ring. Forget your perfect offering. There is a crack in everything -- that’s how the light gets in.”
The alchemist stirs common ingredients into the light of gold. Completion seems to grow out of never giving up on yourself. Without an easy remedy, my own potion for living with myeloma includes the question “What bells can I ring?”
Somebody I know has lived with cancer for a number of years and now has hospice care. She continues to blog from her bed with candor and humor. I am in awe of this gift -- honored to be a witness to her effort to engage with life until the end.
Today is a crisp autumn day and I am thankful to be able to ride my bike through the beauty of red and gold trees. Lucky too!
Pat Pendleton is a multiple myeloma patient and columnist at The Myeloma Beacon. You can view a list of her columns here.
If you are interested in writing a regular column to be published on The Myeloma Beacon, please contact the Beacon team at .
Hi Pat,
I couldn't agree more. I enjoy special things when they happen, but I'm no longer looking for them to make me happy. There is a grace, even holiness, about everyday things--the stuff of life--that I've become so much more aware of. I believe that the contentment I feel when I sit out on my swing with my feet up and read a book or write in my journal has more to do with my well-being than anything I could accomplish from a bucket list--if I had one.
I think you left out the line "There is a Crack in Everythng" from Anthem, which is one of my favorite poems. Is that where you came up with your "cracked cup"? Love it.
I love your attitude. I'm new to all this MM stuff, and I hope to keep such a great attitude too.
Lovely, Pat. More luck is needed for each of us. Suzanne
Darlene...Thank you for pointing out my omission in the wonderful LC quote (corrected now). My "cracked" cup refers to a ceramic pot that I made a long time ago and is the cover of my book, The Cracked Cup.
Pat,
I know people with perfect health who live in constant unhappiness. Keep ringing your bells.
Best wishes,
B.
than you pat so many good points thank you for keeping it real blessing to you mary louise
Thank you Pat.
You are a wonderful writer. The prose costumes your message perfectly.
Happy Halloween!
Hi Pat!
I love the quote from Anthem.
Just wonderful!
Your Cracked Cup blog, let's the light in for many of us.
Enjoy your weekend.
Thanks Pat...I have always loved Cohen's work...right back from the late sixties when I was just a teen! He is a poet/philosopher of our time..starting with 'Suzanne', 'Birds on a Wire', more lately..'Anthem', 'Hallelujah'. How about the first verse from the 'Sisters of Mercy'...
'The sisters of mercy they are not departed or gone.
They were waiting for me when I thought that I just can't go on.
And they brought me their comfort and later they brought me their song.
Oh, I hope you run into them soon, you who've been travelling so long.'
Cohen was always a wise soul .. thanks for bringing your quote into your work...I have that song on my I-pod and often listen to it out on walks. Enjoy reading your column.
Yes, enjoy your weekend and Happy Hallowe'en....
Dear Pat,
The words of Leonard Cohen are so profound. Thank you so much for sharing. I find them comforting and uplifting, and I'm grateful you share your wisdom with us.
Linda
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