Last week, I promised to share a few tips that some of my multiple myeloma friends use to stay positive.

Staying positive does not cure cancer—and it probably doesn’t help extend a patient’s life. Surprised? Don’t be. There are a number of studies which prove this to be the case, including a large, 1,000 patient study ^[1], published in 2007 in the American Cancer Society’s journal Cancer.

A reader once commented on one of my blogs, “Pushing the idea that a positive attitude can help defeat cancer may leave some patients feeling like failures—especially if their cancer doesn’t respond well to treatment. It is time to stop blaming the patient for their cancer.”

I agree! But this column isn’t about that. While there is little proof that a positive attitude can help keep cancer at bay, few experts disagree that staying positive during treatment can help improve a patient’s quality of life.

How does one stay positive when faced with the overwhelming reality of a multiple myeloma diagnosis? To help find the answers, I asked myeloma patients for suggestions.

Donald wrote, “Realize that you can find opportunities in negative situations. Albert Einstein said, ‘In the middle of every difficulty lies opportunity.’”

Dotty, a reader from Texas suggested, “If you have a hobby or work you enjoy, try to continue it, even if it's hard at times.”

Sean volunteered, “I don't allow multiple myeloma to overshadow all of the things in my life for which I am grateful… I focus on my wife, children, pets and friends. This mess I find myself in is not all about me. We are a connected group that has chosen to be positive. We choose to live life, not fear impending death.”

Professor Sandra Stokes, from the University of Wisconsin-Green Bay, likes to keep it simple. She proposed, “How about that the definition of normal is constantly changing and that that's ok?”

Eleanor from Florida keeps it simpler still. Her advice was simply, “Have fun!” I’m with her on that. My motto, even before my diagnosis was always: “Work hard, play hard, and have fun!”

Lance shared, “I found that reading success and survivor stories of others was extremely helpful when we were first diagnosed.”

Lynn wrote, “Once I faced such a dismal possibility, I decided to take hold of emotions and focus on events that life is all about—learning, doing, experiencing, sharing. So, I've picked up Spanish studies again with a fervor, listed projects to accomplish, and planned short excursions. Right now, we're training a two month old puppy, adopted in large part, to take focus off of my multiple myeloma. It's already brought laughter back into the house. A city girl, I've started an organic garden. I'm reaching out to girlfriends, discovering common hobbies, and becoming more involved in the community.”

Finally, another patient insisted, “Relaxation, meditation, support groups, and prayer can help all of us cope with our disease.”

I would like to add that experience—just knowing what to expect—can help all of us cope. With time, we can all learn to stay more positive. And that’s important, because staying positive helps us appreciate our lives and the world around us.

Next week, I will add suggestions to help improve a patient’s quality of life, including dealing with the day-to-day pain and inconveniences caused by ongoing myeloma therapy.

Until then, feel good and keep smiling! Pat